Love, life or whatever we’re dealing with atm - all come with a side of uncertainty
Sweetie, just a note. Hang in there. Life is not easy to understand but He will show us if we are open to what He is asking of us. I learned to meditate because I was at the bottom of the barrel in my life (always suffering my wrong choices but was a "good person" and tried to help others, etc.) and was at the point where God could finally get my attention. I thought it was the stupidest thing when it was suggested to me but I was so desperate I started doing it. Before that, I kept doing things "my way" and reaping the consequences or results. It's not that we are bad - it is that we have a lot of emotional baggage (hidden thoughts in the subconscious) that keep running things and we don't even know it. Anyway, what happened is God got in because I was surrendering my ego finally (daily, bit by bit) and it filled the hole in my heart, took away any desires for drinking, drugs (pot) and "looking for love" - God really is that empty Void we are seeking to fill and the only way that hole is filled is when we sit in the Silence. Our Soul is calling us. Really, it works. When we are ready, God answers. Bless you, Tola.