‘And just like that…’

The second series of the Sex And The City sequel starts this week and I’m thinking about my own life sequel and what that might look like

‘There are thousands, maybe tens of thousands of women like this in the city, we all know them and we all agree they’re great. They travel, they pay taxes. They’ll spend $400 on a pair of Manolo Blahnik strappy sandals. And they’re alone.’

For the uninformed, these are the words of Carrie Bradshaw in the opening of the very first episode of the Sex And The City series which ran for six seasons in the 90s and early noughties. Set in New York City, the series follows the lives of four women—three in their mid-thirties and one in her forties—who, despite their different natures and ever-changing sex lives, remain inseparable and confide in each other. I first came across the show while at university and as a writer who loved socialising, shoes and… we’ll use “dating” to keep this PG-friendly but you know the s-word I mean – protagonist Carrie felt like a kindred spirit.

Even though the series was old by then, in my first year of university, I pitched a column idea to the local paper which was unashamedly based on the life and character of Carrie; only on a student budget. It was the musings of a “student girl about town” and once commissioned, I was free to write about chaos in Halls, campus relationships, student union parties and spending so much money on clothes there was little left for groceries. Shopping and studying shared equal space in my weekly column and I loved paying homage to such a ground-breaking character in one of the most well-known TV shows in the Western world.

Me, channeling my inner Carrie with an almost identical jacket

After university I moved back home and my pursuit to find a career in journalism felt a lot less glamorous than Carrie’s and as I searched for a salary I could live on, I was baffled at how she managed to live such a lavish lifestyle when her only job was writing one regular column. (Although now in my 30s, I know all the secrets about how to live that fashion high life so, you do you, girl!) Becoming a journalist became more weighty and serious as I started working for a Christian charity as assistant to the editor. In my heart I dreamed of fashion cupboards, zero fat lattes and press passes to fashion week. But as I continued to get turned down by the many glossy mags I applied to, I settled down into life as a mainstream consumer journalist and the – less exhilarating but lovely – perks that came with that.

I once kicked a guy I was seeing out of bed in the morning so I could go pick up a pair of silver Balenciaga boots

It wasn’t until after my divorce that I remembered that style of living I’d once desired. I had the opportunity to live in a two-bedroom flat in a trendy part of North London – by myself! I longed not to co-habit with messy flatmates and quickly made the apartment my own, even being featured on Apartment Therapy when I finished doing it up. In that period of my life, I was freelancing and spent hours typing away on my pink laptop drinking champagne and eating fancy crisps for supper. Shopping once again became my number 1 hobby and I sent flowers to the shop staff at my favourite lingerie brand so I’d be first in line when new stock came in and once kicked a guy I was seeing out of bed in the morning so I could go pick up a pair of silver Balenciaga boots that my friend had put on hold for me. It felt wonderfully indulgent and the most Carrie-like I’d ever been. But to return to Carrie’s words at the beginning of this article, I was alone. And I realised I had become tired of living alone.

In the months following cancer treatment I decided I wanted to live what I call a “soft life” and part of that involved moving away from London to the Cotswolds where I told the first guy I dated that contrary to popular belief, I was not a strong independent woman and was in fact looking for an interdependent relationship. And I still am. But before you worry that I’ve become boring in this new stage of life, let me assure you that it is still just as fabulous!

I long for the days when I can roam around the Cotswolds with my dreamy Cotswold stone farmhouse as a base

In the sequel series, And Just Like That*, we see three of the four main characters, now in their 50s as they navigate a new stage of life with career moves, health challenges, partners and children. And that’s with the same incredible wardrobes and appetite for life. As for my sequel: though still in my 30s, I kind of yearn for the days when I can roam around the Cotswolds with my dreamy Cotswold stone farmhouse as a base. I’ll drive a 2006 Land Rover with a Hungarian Vizsla by my side. I’ll write chapters for my book in between foraging for delicious wild herbs to accompany dinners served on an oversized sturdy wooden table for nearby friends and family. But there’ll be no twee interiors for me. My home will be an eclectic mix of large hand-sewn rugs from the Atlas Mountains in Morocco, masses of wall art and scandi kitchenware.  And instead of pinafores and flowery prints, I’ll exist in a uniform of Isabel Marant cut-off shorts, oversized shirts – French tucked of course – and barefoot.

It’s a far cry from my days of obsession with shoes and lingerie – although they will of course play a part - but it’s a sequel I’m looking forward to, and after what feels like years of waiting, please God, I’m hoping it really does happen, ‘just like that’.

Tola x

*(season two premieres this Thursday 22 June on HBO)